Osama Still Alive
So sayeth the counter-rumors.
Here's the thing: bin Laden exists in the Heisenberg state of being simultaneously both dead and alive. No one knows for sure -- or rather those who do know aren't talking. So long as news about him can pop up when needed, he serves as a symbol to both "sides": a saintly freedom fighter for one and evil incarnate for the other. Bush's speechwriters have re-discovered Osama's intrinsic rhetorical value: as if to make up for the lack of mentions, this September 5th, Bush gave a speech on the "Global War on Terror" in which he referred to bin Laden no less than 17 times. By name.
Oh, and the conspiracy thing: if you believe that, I can also provide you evidence that the moon landing was faked, too.
Conspiracy theory du jour: Wagging the dog
The news-sphere is abuzz with reports of a "leak" from French intelligence that Osama bin Laden died last month due to typhoid. It's time to reveal my own personal conspiracy theory: Yes, Osama is dead; but he died five years ago, after the initial US invasion into Afganistan, at the attack on the Tora Bora caves complex. Since then, all "appearances" of Osama, in audio and infrequent video, occuring at conveniently timed intervals have been produced and orchestrated by the AV technogeeks at the super-secret CIA (or even NSA) PsyOps division. As any regular watcher of Alias or Mission Impossible can tell you: faking a voice or video recording is as easy as, well, American pie. A February 1999 Washington Post article posits the technology exists: "Digital morphing -- voice, video, and photo-- has come of age, available for use in psychological operations. PSYOPS, as the military calls it, seek to exploit human vulnerabilities in enemy governments, militaries and populations to pursue national and battlefield objectives." ("When Seeing and Hearing isn't Believing").
